10 Weeks Down!

Hello Everyone!

 

Well... what a whirlwind these past few weeks have been! I can not believe how quickly this is all happening. It seems like only yesterday we were getting our head round the idea that we will be having IVF. Now, after a short while it seems, we are pregnant with our little miracle.

 

You may recall in the earlier days of this blog I said something along the lines of 'I will not moan throughout my pregnancy'. Well I can tell you that I have moaned... a lot... ha ha! It is only really because of the morning (midday, afternoon, evening, night-time) sickness though. The tiredness I can deal with, I love bed! It is purely just this constant feeling of nausea and the fact that I am now, without fail vomiting every morning. Nice...

 

I hope I am one of the 'lucky' sufferers of morning sickness (or Hyperemesis, as it has been written on my notes) that stop feeling this way once the 12 week barrier is passed. I have just about had enough of it now, considering it started at 6 weeks exactly! I have become a bit of a recluse really, but I am hoping that once the nausea stops I will be able to get on with my life as normal again!

 

Amongst that symptom I still get tired a lot, I have dizzy spells and the odd minor headache. I also have a lovely roadmap of veins that are appearing all the time, not just on my breasts but also my legs. My tummy feels as though it is starting to stretch, although I am yet to have a visible 'bump'. My hair and nails are growing rapidly, and my bottom often 'pipes up' throughout the day! I guess my least attractive symptom is the fine hair that is growing on my tummy. How disgusting!

 

Our meeting with the midwife was brilliant, although she did say that I was probably dehydrated, and my blood pressure was quite low, but that is normal. It was just so lovely to finally get my 'bounty pack' and notes. It made it so much more real somehow. I even had to take it with me to a blood test and it probably looked like I was displaying it with pride, ha ha!

 

As the days pass this pregnancy is becoming more and more real. Sometimes I am still caught by the awe of it all. I am pregnant... I can't believe it! Phil and I are still in shock I think? We are both incredibly happy though. To think that in just 30 weeks (this number may seem a lot, but it really isn't!) the child that we have been waiting for will be here. Madness...

 

We are soon to have our 12 week scan, it is booked for the 31st May, when I will (should) be 12 weeks and 2 days. We are really looking forward to seeing baby Dave again, and seeing how he/she has progressed since the 7 week scan. I do find myself worrying that something will go wrong, or be wrong with Dave, but Phil keeps on telling me that it will all be perfect so I should try and hold on to that really... it is hard though.

 

Still, I must be positive! There is a lot to look forward to, and I want to just put it in writing now that I think baby Dave is going to be a girl... just a feeling!

 

Take Care All x

We're Pregnant!!!

Hello Everyone!

Well i think my title says it all! Ha ha! I was going to be vague about it at first but then i thought, why not shout it from the rooftops!

Our scan was so wonderful, whilst Phil was a bit nervous for some reason i wasn't? Strange... We arrived at the clinic and went to sit in the waiting room. It was quite funny really, we were sitting there, relaxed, reading magazines and drinking tea! You wouldn't think we were about to see if we were pregnant or not!

We were called into the room and i got undressed and got myself sorted (it was an internal scan, i guess as it is still early days a normal ultrasound is not good enough?) on the chair and we got started. It must be so hard for the nurse when the scan results in bad news, i for one would not like to be in her shoes.

I think she quickly flashed through my uterus/ womb to try and see the embryo before we did so she could prepare herself, but we saw it! In all its glory! Then satisfied with her check she showed us our lovely little baby. Just 1 in there thankfully! Baby Dave (our embryo's nickname) was beautiful, and what was even more lovely was watching his little heart beating away. That is all we wanted to see, that our little one was in the right place and that he was alive.

Then she went through all the other parts of the scan, including checking the speed of his heartbeat, which was 133 beats per minute, and then she printed us off a picture of Dave:

So there is our lovely little baby, who was on the day of the scan 7 weeks and 1 day old and was almost 1cm in size! Also what is really lovely is that our due date is 11/12/13! What a fantastic date! Maybe Dave will be born at 9:10 and weigh 7lb8oz? Wouldn't that be easy to remember?

I don't think it has sunk in yet, although my symptoms are doing their best to inform me of his presence! I am constantly nauseous, and have actually vomited a fair few times too! My stomach has grown already, although i think that it is just bloating! My breasts are huge too so after the scan we went to Mothercare and bought some new bras. Still i am looking on the bright side of things and i am glad that i have symptoms, it gives me confidence in this pregnancy.

I was then told that i am still to continue with the Crinone Gel (grrr) for another month and also that i needed to contact my doctor from now on as we were finished with Bourn Hall (which is so sad...), so naturally i called my doctor straight away and have an appointment with a nurse on Wednesday (1st May)!

As the days pass by we are both getting more and more excited about our little Baby Dave, Phil is looking after the both of us really well, cleaning my bucket out for me and helping me relax. He is really excited about being a daddy. My sister in law said to me 'i am going to be an auntie!' and i replied 'i am going to be a mummy!' Wow... i have never said that before, and to be able to say that was just wonderful to me...

Phil tells me that i need to stop blaming Dave for everything, 'baby Dave wants another biscuit, not me!' and 'baby Dave keep's farting!'. Ha ha! I love that we are more relaxed about it all now and that we can start to enjoy our pregnancy.

Exciting things are coming for us, let's all keep our fingers crossed!

Take Care All x

Not Long Now!

Hello Everyone!

We now have less than 48 hours until we have our early scan to see if our first attempt at IVF has miraculously worked and we are feeling very excited (but still a bit cautious of course) about it!. This past week has thankfully gone relatively quickly, which we are really grateful for.

My symptoms are getting progressively worse, especially the tiredness and sickness/ nausea. I can deal with the tiredness because quite frankly i like sleeping! Ha ha! The nausea and sickness is beyond ridiculous now though. I am unable to do anything as i am constantly reaching for my orange bucket. Even then it isn't a huge amount of sick but it sure does feel like it will be at the time!

The nausea is waking me up in the night, at least twice a night for the past couple of nights, Meaning that i have to sit up in bed, cuddling my bucket, slowly eating a ginger biscuit. Poor Phil wakes up too and feels bad as there is nothing he can do, bless him. I guess all i can do is wait for this phase to pass, i only hope it will be sooner rather than later!

I am really enjoying reading the 'what to expect when you are expecting' book. It really is an excellent read and i would recommend it to everyone! It is giving me lots of brilliant tips, as are my family and friends!

Tonight is going to be interesting! I will be going to go for a nap shortly because at 10:20pm tonight a taxi will arrive to take me to the BBC radio station in Chelmsford as i am going to be talking live (with other pregnant ladies too) on the BBC Radio 5 Live 11pm show 'Bump Club'. They are going to be talking about IVF tonight and i am really looking forward to doing it. I am also a bit nervous about saying something silly, but i am sure i will be ok. I will probably fall asleep in the taxi on the way home though! I just hope i don't have a long period of nausea throughout the show. That would be horrible... i must remember to take my ginger biscuits!

So now it is really just a case of getting through tomorrow and then travelling up to Bourn Hall on Thursday to hopefully have our long awaited dreams come true.

I really do hope they do...

Take Care All x

Count down to Scan Day!

Hello Everyone!

So it has been a fair few days since my last post and quite a lot has happened. I have wanted to write a new post for over a week now but to be honest i have been absolutely knackered! Sometimes i have had to have a nap in the afternoon and most nights i am in bed by 9am. This might sound normal to some people but i don't usually fall asleep until after midnight!

My second test date was on Monday (15th) and as i expected it came back positive (the numbers are days past transfer):

I have done quite an amount of testing this past week, including a Clearblue one and all of them have come back positive, the most recent ones turning very positive (the test line has been stronger than the control line) the minute my wee (TMI, he he) hits them!

What was really nice was the Clearblue test showing me this:

It was so lovely to see those words 'Pregnant', and the 3+ weeks showed me that my HCG levels are rising, which the increasingly strong lines have been proving too. I couldn't stop looking at it! Luckily the result disappears after about 24 hours so i could carry on with the rest of my life! Ha ha.

So after my positive on Monday i called to clinic to let them know and they confirmed that my scan will be on the 25th April (next Thursday) at 2:15pm! It is very exciting but nerve-wracking at the same time! We are counting down the days that thankfully so far are going quite quickly. Just over a week to go until the time where we will see if our first attempt has worked. We will be so lucky if it has! As long as there is at least 1 little baby growing in there we will be incredibly happy, if there are 2 then that is great too!

My symptoms continue to increase in severity and i am not complaining (well... maybe a little bit). I am glad that i am feeling this way because it must mean that someone is in there, making me feel this way, creating all of the changes inside me.

The worst still is the tiredness, especially when i am at work... but a close contender is a lovely change to an old symptom... nausea. So now not only do i feel sick pretty much the whole day i have for the past few days actually been sick (only a little bit though), and because i am a bit different to most people, my 'morning sickness' only occurs in the evening. Usually whilst i am eating dinner, how lovely.

Amongst other things my breasts are showing me a lot of changes too, my areolas are definitely different, they seem to be darker and also slightly bigger. I also am still growing lots and lots of huge veins across my breasts and my nipples are still tingling at times.

So now it is another wait until our scan next week, we are still remaining cautious but we can't help but get a little bit more excited as the time goes on. We did buy a copy of 'what to expect when you are expecting' and i have been reading a little each day, which has been lovely. It is nice to know that the things that i am feeling are all normal.

I just hope that we can continue to be lucky and are blessed with a perfect, happy and healthy son or daughter in around 7-8 months time...

Take Care All x

Official Test Date (OTD)

Hello Everyone,

First of all a little apology, i noticed that yesterday i had over 80 views on my blog, all of those probably looking to find out the result of my OTD test. I am sorry but i was at work yesterday and last night i was falling asleep at 8pm!

So the result is... BFP!!!

We can't believe it! We are so happy, it is truly a miracle! People keep saying that the lines are really dark but of course i am still worried. I know that a BFP doesn't always mean a baby, so we are still excited but cautious...

I called the clinic to let them know of the outcome and they said that i am to do another test next Monday (the 15th) and if that is also positive they will arrange a scan for me. They said the scan is usually done around day 35-40 after ovulation, today is day 19 so i would estimate that the scan will be in the last week of April.

I am still having lots of lovely symptoms. I say lovely because i would rather have them than not have them. The one that is most noticeable is the constant tiredness, i am literally falling asleep most nights at 8pm-9pm! It is ridiculous, especially as i am a night owl and usually don't even feel tired after midnight!

I have no new symptoms to record, just a few changes... my nipples have become more sensitive and i swear my boobs are sprouting new veins daily! I also had a lot of cramping a few days ago (i am hoping it is the embryo getting nice and snuggled!).

Phil and i are slowly getting used to the idea that we are pregnant. Of course we are still aware of the problems that could arise, but i am keeping my lucky pants and bracelet nearby and we are keeping a positive mind for a positive outcome. There are times when we are really excited, i have caught Phil looking at my tummy a few times and it is hard to get Embie Dave out of our minds. We just really want this to be our chance to be a family.

It is nice to imagine the progression of my pregnancy, significant dates, like the 20 week scan, embie's due date etc... it is nice to look at prams and cribs, baby clothes and car seats. It is what keeps us going and helps us to remain positive, we deserve this little bit of luck.

We can only keep our fingers crossed that we continue to get BFP's and that when the scan date does come around there will be a tiny little fetus (or 2 of them!) all snuggled up and growing nicely in my womb.

The waiting game continues...

Take Care All x

12dp2dt

Hello Everyone!

As you know we are in the 2 week wait (although technically it is 16 days long... yes... too long!) and i am doing ok, i think...

It is a bit strange really, and i find myself  1 minute thinking 'this is going really well, nice and smoothly, no problems' and then the next minute i am going mad, 'it's not worked, AF (period) is coming, no baby for us'... nightmare.

Whilst i know that 'symptoms' can be fabricated by your mind, they can be a result of both AF and pregnancy, plus they can also be due to the Crinone gel that i am using daily (for progesterone support) i am still going to keep a note of them, you know... just encase...

So this week has seen the arrival of many symptoms, some old (that i have had in previous months) and some new which i will go into detail about below.

Old Symptoms:

Fatigue: although never as bad as this, i have been almost falling asleep as early as 8:30pm! I am a night owl usually, and often don't fall asleep until past midnight so this is a really noticeable difference.

Nausea and Vomiting: in the past i have had feelings of nausea but this is much more constant. Plus i have had a few episodes of random vomiting, not enough to require my head down a toilet but enough to notice that it isn't normal.

Breasts changes: i usually have very painful boobs for the week before AF arrives, so much so that it feels like i want to just cut them off! I have had mild pain but nothing like what i usually have. They do seem bigger than usual and my areola's do seem to be slightly darker, but this could be related to AF also.

Cramping: a few days before AF is due i usually get a few cramps throughout the day, these are very dull and can last for quite a while. The cramps i have been having are very different to that though, these feel sharper, and are only on one side. I think that they could possibly be due to constipation too though.

New Symptoms:

Dizziness: almost every time i stand up i have to be slow about it as i can get very dizzy, very quickly!

Smell: i don't know if i am just more aware of things or if i really can smell things easier. For the last week i have been not only smelling perfume/ deodorant etc on people but also B.O is very obvious to me, which makes me feel quite sick. It was quite shocking really! Everything just seems to be stronger smelling.

Headaches: i have pretty much had a headache for the whole of this week and it is not letting up.

Mood: i haven't had my usual happy 1 minute, angry the next mood swings. This time though i am crying a lot, and i mean a lot! I cried at a radio advert, TV programs (someone made a really nice dish on Masterchef and i cried my eye's out for her!), things i have read that i wouldn't usually cry at. Sometimes i just start to cry and i have no idea why!

Constipation: i have been really constipated this week, but that could be a result of the progesterone.

There have been a few more 'symptoms' i am sure but i can't really remember them all. Should of written them down... oh well! Of course even with these symptoms we are still sticking to our 'positive but cautious' outlook.

We now have 4 more days until out OTD (official test date) and they are not passing quick enough! I am trying to keep myself busy, seeing family and friends, sleeping (ha ha!) and this weekend my friend Robyn and i are going to a craft show at the Excel in London, we can't wait!!!

So until Monday... fingers crossed!

Take Care All x

5dp2dt

Hello Everyone!

 

The blog title is a bit strange right?

 

It means  that i am currently 5 days past a 2 day transfer, for a 'normal' pregnancy this would put me at 7 days past ovulation, half way through the 2 week wait (2ww). For me though that is not the case as with our clinic we have to wait to test until we are 16dp2dt... so as you can see i have a little while to go yet!

 

I have had a fair few 2ww's in the past (36 to be exact!). Some of them quickly passing and some of them taking absolute ages! This 2ww though will be the hardest of all, and i know this because it has only been 5 days since we had our perfect little embryo put back in and already im thinking hurry up 2ww!!!

 

I hate wishing my life away, i think i mentioned this last year, one of the things that annoyed me the most about our time spent trying to conceive naturally was that i had wasted the best part of 2 years living my life in 2 week increments. We were either waiting for ovulation or in the 2ww, and it sucked! Imagine the things i could have achieved in that 2 year period, i could of studied something, changed my life somehow, but no, i just spent the whole time waiting for those 2 little lines to show on a test, and they never came...

 

It is so hard not to think about the embryo all the time, especially now as for the next couple of days it should (hopefully) be implanting into my womb lining. I do have a few 'symptoms' but they could just be symptoms of the Crinone Gel (which by the way is disgusting). At the moment i am very bloated, i feel sick, i have massive painful boobs, i have had a few episodes of bleeding gums (this is think could be due to a hormone being released to help the embryo implant) which is something i never have and i am having a few little cramps.

 

I also keep thinking that im about to come on my period (the following might be a bit too much information) as i am feeling very 'wet' down there. I think it is just clear cervical mucus, which is normal, but i wish it would stop worrying me!

 

There is nothing to do now except hope that this 2ww goes nice and quickly and that our little embryo grows into our little baby(s)!

 

Take Care All x

Egg Transfer

Hello Everyone!

Today Phil and i made our way to Bourn Hall for our egg transfer at 10am. Typically it was snowing when we left our house at 8am and all the way to the clinic but we got there safe still, and early!

After a short wait we went into a little room to go through various things. These included questions about how i was feeling after the egg collection on Thursday, how the egg transfer was going to be done and what the process was for the weeks ahead. After that we went into a waiting area, which was really lovely. I had to have a full bladder for the procedure so kept drinking lots of water. Towards the end i was absolutely bursting!

A nurse came to collect us both and take us into the theatre where we were greeted by the embryologist. Phil and i were both nervous about our 3 little embryo's and whether they were of good quality, or even if we still had them! The embryologist just jumped straight into it and told us that they had already frozen 2 of the embryo's (this was such a shock as they only freeze good embryo's at minimum!) and that we had 1 top quality embryo to use today.

To say we were pleased is a severe understatement! All of our 3 embryo's survived and made it to this point and the 1 we were using was a top quality one... wow... my lucky pants have done it again!

Then i was asked to strip from the waist down and put on a hospital gown, hop on the bed, put my legs in the stirrups and relax... i was so worried that i was going to wee on the doctor at this point! Ha ha. With Phil sitting to one side of me and the ultrasound machine on the other side the doctor eased the speculum into my lady bits, which was not too bad. Then the embryologist brought our wonderful embryo into the room in a long syringe/tube thing and the doctor fed the tube (which is similar to a catheter) into my womb. It was magical as we could see it weaving into my womb on the ultrasound machine.

Then the doctor released the embryo (which we again saw, although it was very small) and removed the tube so that the embryologist could check that the embryo was not in it still. Then the speculum was removed and i was told to just relax for a few minutes before getting up and getting dressed. Then we left the clinic (not before having a wee of course!).

On the drive home we stopped at a 'Welcome Break' services to have something for lunch, and then as we were leaving Phil treated me to a Krispy Kreme donut and a Starbucks Frappuccino, he said that he didn't want anything but as we were waiting for my order there was a lady who's latte was made wrong so it was offered out. Talk about being in the right place at the right time! Phil had himself a fratte (a free-latte)!

All in all today has been fantastic, much better than expected. I was so worried about having a 2 day transfer, about the egg quality not being great and about the 3 embryo's not surviving but nothing bad happened... everything went so well!

I can finally say we are PUPO!

So now it is just a case of keeping this little one safe and hoping it implants well and grows into our first little baby.

The 2 week wait is upon us, fingers crossed for a positive result!

Take Care All x

Feeling Strange...

Hello Everyone!

At 2:10pm today i called the clinic for the update on our 7 little eggs and right now i think Phil and i are in a state of shock...

Out of the 7 collected 6 eggs were suitable for ICSI (a process of injecting the sperm directly into the egg) and out of those 6 only 3 have fertilised.

We are booked in for our egg transfer tomorrow morning at 10pm (although i expect there will be a bit of a wait before the embryo is put back) and we are both a little bit... meh?

I think it is because it is happening so soon! This last week has gone so mad we haven't really had time to think. There has been appointment after appointment, the egg collection was only yesterday and to have the transfer tomorrow? I just haven't had time to think about it.

I think we are a little bit sad that only 3 of our eggs have made it to embryo's, but at the same time we are really happy that we have the 3. It is a strange feeling and situation to be in.

Right now i think we just need to relax and keep our minds positive... easier said than done...

Fingers crossed everyone!

Take Care All x

Egg Collection

Hello Everyone!

Today we had our egg collection (EC) at Bourn Hall in Cambridge. We had to arrive at the clinic at 8:15 and because of where Phil and i live we had to get up for 5:30am! It wasn't that hard really, what was hard was that Phil could have a cup of coffee and i could not... bad times.

So we got to the clinic in good time, the number of cars on the road that early in the morning is ridiculous! After signing in at reception we walked round to the Nurse's Station where we were taken to a ward and i was put in bed number 2. There was a couple already in bed number 1 and after about 15 minutes of us being there the couple for number 3 arrived.

After a short while a nurse came in to go through some paperwork and Phil was given his 'special cup', i was given a delightful pessary to put in my bottom to help with pain relief and i was asked to change into a hospital gown. Then our doctor came in to introduce himself and ask if we had any questions etc.

Phil was then taken to a side room to do his bit, he tells me it was quite nice in the room with an unexpected array of dvd's and magazines. What a lucky boy!

Meanwhile i was walked down to theatre and as soon as i got on the bed i was surrounded by about 5 smiling female faces. It was quite surreal really! The anaesthetist put a cannula in and then set about putting me to sleep, which did not take long at all!

The procedure involves the doctor inserting a needle though my vaginal wall and into each ovary, the follicles are then drained into the needle and the liquid is then checked for an egg. Not all the follicles will contain eggs and very rarely a follicle could contain 2 eggs.

Fast forward 30-40 minutes and i wake up, have a little cry (hormones... urgh) and promptly ask the nurse standing over me for a cuddle! Ha ha, luckily Phil was on hand for that! Then i had a sandwich (cheese and pickle to be precise, and it was lovely!) a cup of coffee and just relaxed for an hour or so.

After a while a nurse came in to sign us out. Amongst other things she told us that the doctor had collected 7 eggs, which is a good number. You need to get a good balance, too many and the quality of the eggs can be diminished. We are really pleased with 7, plus it is a lucky number!

She said that i was to call tomorrow at 2:10pm to see how well the eggs have fertilised with Phil's sample and to see if we are in a position to book the Egg Transfer. It is unlikely that all of the eggs will fertilise, they hope for at least 70% so i would hope that we get 4 or 5 embryo's. Fingers crossed!

Then she said that tonight i am to start using the Crinone Gel which is a progesterone gel to support my womb lining. I will be using it every night, at 6:30pm and she said once it is applied it is a good idea to walk around for about 20 minutes to warm it up and help it activate. Then Phil and i left and when we got home i had a good few hours sleep.

At 6:30pm i applied the first gel, this is what it looks like fresh out of the box:

First you need to shake the pipette up and then twist of the end:

Then whilst sitting or lying down you insert the pipette into your vagina and firmly squeeze the end so that all of the gel is deposited inside.

It was a relatively simple process and then Phil and i went for a 20 minute walk, which was nice.

Now almost 12 hours since the egg collection i am feeling good, my throat is a little sore, i have a bit of pain in my stomach, just like a mild period cramp and also have a little bit of blood but it is nothing to worry about.

Plus my lovely friends Robyn and Loz just popped in and they have bought me a Pandora bead that is orange (the colour of fertility) with little spots on it which Robyn said represents little eggs. What a lovely gift!

I am happy about the 7 little eggs that we have and hope that they are doing well and that the phone call tomorrow will bring good news.

Here's to the next few days,

Take Care All x