31 May 2016

7dp2dt

Hello Everyone!

Another one of those strange cryptic titles again. Only this time i am further along in the 2ww (2 week wait)! 

So it has been a whole week since our two beautiful frosties were thawed and replaced back into their hopeful home for the next 8-9 months. How has that time gone so fast already! It probably helps that we were on holiday for the most part of the last 7 days, and then we all know how fast weekends seem to go by!

At the moment we are 7dp2dt - 7 days past our 2 day transfer (2 day old embryos), this makes us 9dpo (days past ovulation) in a normal 2ww countdown. This leaves us with 6 days left until test day! I have been at work today, and will now be off again until the 6th of June, which is our OTD. Again, what with work days dragging and then days off speeding past, i don't suppose this 2ww will seem to last forever at all. Before we know it, we will know the outcome of all of this...

I am sure most people who are TTC, assisted or not, can't help themselves but engage in a little bit of 'Symptom Spotting'. I told myself i wasn't going to this time. That i would just relax and not try to read into any feelings or possible symptoms of pregnancy i may experience. However... anyone who knows me will know that keeping up with that was never going to happen! Ha ha.

I also think it is helpful to list down everything so others can compare their own 'symptoms' at similar stages. I actually started to feel certain things at 5dp2dt, which coincidentally i was able to confirm with using this blog myself. It was so lovely to read back to my post called '5dp2dt' and i was so happy to see that i had the exact same 'symptoms' at the exact same time all those years ago.

So here we go, my 'symptoms' so far:

0dp2dt - 4dp2dt:

No notable symptoms (i was feeling tired but that is nothing new on the past weeks).

5dp2dt:

Bloating and mild cramping. Body feels achey.

6dp2dt: 

Huge cramping, all over lower pelvic area. Feel like AF will arrive today. Implantation should start from today and carry on for the next day or so. Back aching again today. Breasts feeling heavy and nipples feel sore. Had a little lie down in the afternoon.

7dp2dt:

Mild cramps, back and legs aching. Have started to get heartburn, something i never get normally, but had almost every day when pregnant with Emma. Again my breasts feel huge, and my nipples are still sore.

Hopefully all of these 'symptoms' are pointing towards 1 or 2 of our frosties snuggling in and growing nicely. They certainly do seem to be very positive signs. The trouble with IVF/FET however is that there is always the chance that any 'symptom' you have can also be explained away as a side effect from all of the medication...

At the moment though i am feeling confident that at least 1 of our little ones is implanting.

We can only wait and see. Come on 6 days!!!

Take Care All x

24 May 2016

Embryo Transfer Day

Hello Everyone,

So transfer day finally arrived. I am not sure if I was ready, but it came as quick as the rest of them. Yesterday flew by which was lovely. It was lucky that we were travelling to Centre Parcs because the journey took up most of the day, then organising and sorting through everything at the villa, before long it was time for dinner. Then my MIL Chris and I spent the evening playing Scrabble. So although thoughout the day I felt panic and chest pain at the thought of tomorrow, it wasn't long before it was time to say goodbye to Monday and hello to Embryo Transfer Day!

Despite my nerves of the day I did manage to get a half decent sleep. The ward nurse had called me on Monday to confirm that our appointment time for the transfer was 11:15am. I asked her if she knew anything about the embryos at all but she said they would not be thawed until the morning of the transfer. She said we would only receive a phone call if the embryos failed to survive the thawing.

As you can expect, my nerves were all over the place this morning. I could not stop looking at my phone. Watching every 15 minutes go by and wondering if the next 15 would bring bad news. I thought to myself that if I could make it to 10:30 without having received a phone call then we should have at least 1 embryo to transfer.

We left our villa at Centre Parcs and got to the clinic in good time. 10:30 passed and I had still not had a phone call so I was feeling quite confident that we would have something transferred. We walked up to the reception, and then on to the ward. Everyone was so lovely, all of their faces smiling, and still in the back of my mind I was thinking 'they haven't made it'...

We went into a little room with a nurse who went through the the details of the day, what we were here for, and what the steps after a transfer are. She gave me 2 pregnancy tests and then asked if we had any questions. Although I was desperate to know what had happen with our embryos, I wasn't ready to know. I didn't want to leave the blissful ignorance of the possibility of everything being ok. However I did think, surely they wouldn't have gone through all of the next steps and given me pregnancy tests if there wasn't anything to transfer?

After a short wait we were called into the theatre for the transfer. It was the same room that was used when Emma was put back in. It was so nice having that as a memory to think about. We were asked to sit down and told that the embryologist, Laura would be in to discuss our embryos. We still were not sure how many had survived, and if they had, were they of good quality. I was still happy to wait for Laura to tell us. I wanted to keep my happy bubble for as long as I could.

Laura walked in and immediately my heart seemed to stop beating and I held my breath. She smiled and explained that BOTH our embryos had survived the thawing!!! We were a 100% couple! She could barely hold her happiness when she then went on to say that they were both doing so well. They were a 4 cell embryo and 3 cell embryo, and neither of them had any fragmentation! They were the best possible outcome we could have had! Wow... I broke down in tears, I could not believe it. I was literally lost for words. How lucky could we be?! We were amazed.

She then left the room to go and prepare our TWO embryos for transfer!

After getting myself undressed and settled onto the chair/bed thing, an ultrasound was used to help guide the catheter in. Then Laura brought our embryos in and we watched as they were replaced back into my womb. Hopefully to grow big and strong and into our beautiful baby(s).

I got dressed and Phil and I left for the hour drive back to Centre Parcs. Both completely shocked at what had happened. Just hours earlier I was worrying about there being no embryos to transfer... and now, here we were, PUPO with two!!!

Two perfect, amazing embryos. Meaning that all 3 of our embryos in total from all of our fertility treatment have been returned back to me.

I know how lucky we are, and I am so grateful.

So for now it is just a case of keeping these little ones snuggled in tight and hopefully in 2 weeks I can do a test and it will be positive!

Positive thoughts everyone!

Take Care All xxx

22 May 2016

Nervous...

Hello Everyone!

Sorry i am a day late with my update. Yesterday just flew by! Before i knew it i was putting Emma to bed and going to bed myself! Absolutely shattered at the moment...

We are now less that 2 days away from our Embryo Transfer that is scheduled for Tuesday. We do not have a specific time yet, a nurse will contact us on Tuesday to tell us when to come in, and let us know whether our embryos have even survived the defrosting process. Tuesday morning is going to be so difficult in the lead up to that phone call. I am not sure i will be able to answer it when it rings for fear of the possible heartbreak. I feel sick at the thought of hearing bad news.

My friends have said that i seem to be much more calm this time round, and i can agree with them up to a point. I agree that i haven't been as nervous about the injections, or the scan appointments. Even growing my lining and starting the Crinone gel hasn't really concerned me. However now we are nearing the crossroads of our future. The point at which our lives can lead down 1 path or the other. Will we have a second child, or will our beautiful Emma be our one and only? I can honestly say i do not know what i will do if the embryos both fail to thaw... i am not sure how i will move forward afterwards.

For the time being though am forcing myself back into positive land and assuming that the nurse will call on Tuesday morning with the good news that at least one of our embryos has made it, and could we pop up to the clinic in the afternoon to complete the transfer. Please keep your hearts and minds positive for us!

So yesterday was my last injection day, which went smoothly after the mess that was the day before! On Thursday night just after i did my injection i noticed that i had opened the Buserelin vial on the 2nd of May... you are only supposed to use the vials for up to 15 days from opening... i was on day 17. Queue the massive panic that i had just completely messed up the entire process! What was worse is that the clinic was closed for the day so i couldn't even contact the nurses to check that what i had done hadn't destroyed our chances.  A few ladies on BabyCentre assured me that they too had accidentally done the same thing, and not to worry, they were fine. However on Friday morning i called the clinic and let them know what had happened. They said that it was ok, the medication would not automatically stop working after 15 days but they would like me to collect another vial for the last 2 injections to protect me from a possible infection. Luckily they had one available for me at the smaller Wickford clinic so i quickly drove to collect it that morning. Phew!

A few other minor things went wrong over the course of the Friday and Saturday. Whilst extremely annoying, i like to think that i am having the bad luck now so to make way for the good luck for Tuesday.

After the final injection was over i applied the Crinone gel. Something which can only be described as a 'necessary evil'. This stuff is horrible, but if it helps to keep my baby(s) in my tummy until the placenta takes over then sign me up! Basically the gel is Progesterone support. Which 'tricks' your body into believing that it is pregnant and therefore your body should accept and grow the embryo. It is necessary because with all of the IVF/FET medication i have taken in the last month, my body will not realise it is pregnant as quickly as it would do in a natural conception. So the Crinone just helps things along.

I will now be using the Crinone gel and taking the HRT tablets up until my test date. Then if we are blessed with a positive pregnancy i will be using both medications right up until we are 12 weeks pregnant.

All that is left now is to wait and see what Tuesday brings. I truly hope that with my next update i can tell you all that we are PUPO... all we can do is wait.

Take Care All x

18 May 2016

Lining Scan

Hello Everyone!

How has it been 12 days since i last updated this blog! Time is going so quickly again! Since being on the Progynova to increase my womb lining ready for the Embryo Transfer i have been feeling more tired and nauseous. It is such an easy tablet to take though, and i am now up to 5 per day. My injections are going ok. I am still struggling to get the odd one in, but not long to go now before i can stop them.

Oddly the injection sites this time have not disappeared yet, and have raised into little bumps. My tummy is starting to look like Braille!



Yesterday my sister Lauren, my nephew Tyler and I drove up to Bourn Hall for my second lining scan. The appointment was at 2:45pm but we left nice and early so we could get there in good time, and also stop at the services Phil and I always stop at for lunch. The drive up there was brilliant, nice and smooth all the way to the services. We had some lunch and a nice relaxing cup of tea before continuing the journey and arriving at the clinic.

Even though i have been feeling very bloated, and like something was going on in my tummy area i was still anxious that my lining had not grown enough. Every step towards the final goal comes with its own worries, because there is no guarantee of making it to any part of the process. 

The nurses called us in to the scanning room and i went behind the curtain and hopped onto the chair once again. The nurse said that she was looking for a lining of at least 6mm at this stage, and for it to be nice and smooth. After checking the lining from various different angles she took 2 measurements of 9.2mm and 11.0mm. She said that it looked lovely and will likely grow a little bit more in time for the ET next week. She then checked that my ovaries were still quiet, and they were. What was lovely was that i could watch what she was looking at, and she took the time to explain all the various images to me. It is so fascinating!

After i had got myself dressed and joined Lauren, Tyler and the nurses back at their desk she went on to tell me that my ET will be booked in for Tuesday the 24th, and that they would give me a call on the Tuesday morning to confirm all is well with the embryos, and give us a time to come in for our transfer. I asked her if she knew anything about our embryos chance of survival. She reassured me that they must have been good because the embryologist would not have frozen them if they didn't think they had a chance.

She then went through my next steps for the rest of the week, up until the transfer:

1. Continue to inject 0.2mgs of Buserelin at 6pm daily, with the last injection to be done on Saturday 21st May.

2. Continue to take 5 tablets (10mgs) of Progynova daily. This will continue up until the pregnancy test. If the test is positive then the tablets will continue until i am 12 weeks pregnant (Eeek!).

3. Start the Crinone gel on Saturday 21st May. This will also be continued up until 12 weeks after a positive pregnancy test.

Ah Crinone gel... how i have missed you... NOT! Crinone gel is the Progesterone support to help your body hold on to the embryo(s). It is needed because with IVF/FET etc, your body does not realise it is pregnant until the placenta kicks in months later. Crinone gel is not pleasant, but it is necessary.

I will go in to more detail about that on Saturday! Ha ha.

After the nurse had gone through all of the information she asked if i need any more medication. Lauren (thankfully she was there!) reminded me that i needed the Crinone gel, plus i needed more needles and also Progynova! Honestly, the amount of medication you need is ridiculous!

So the 3 of us (Lauren, Tyler and i) went back into the waiting room to see the dispensing nurse. She was more than happy to give me some more needles and was completely understanding about the fact that i had wasted a few on trying to get them in! Then she gave me another pack of Progynova and a box of 18x Crinone gel applicators.

I asked her how i would go about getting the additional medication i needed should i get a positive pregnancy test. She confirmed that whilst the medication she was giving me today was included in the £200 we had already paid, for the extra medication after a positive test we would need to come and collect it and pay extra.

At around 4pm we left Bourn Hall to start the 1.5 hours journey home. Which actually took us 2.5 hours!!! Ha ha! Luckily we were all in happy spirits and Tyler was a really good boy. It was so lovely to be able to share a part of this experience with Lauren, and have her there to support me.

So, carry on as normal until all change on Saturday!

Take Care All x

6 May 2016

Baseline Scan

Hello Everyone!

I can not believe how fast this FET is going! How are we already half way through the process already? I have a countdown 'app' on my phone and the speed at which we are plowing through each appointment is incredible! Before we know it transfer day will be here and i will be PUPO!

Our appointment yesterday at Bourn Hall went perfectly. After a short wait we were ushered into the scan room by a lady who originally scanned us when we were on our first IVF journey, so that was nice. I quickly popped onto the bed/stirrups and grabbed the little sheet she had left for me, to cover my dignity (ha!). Amazingly the sheet was orange! I glanced at the pile of sheets folded by the machine and only 2 others were orange, and they were very low down in the pile. This was a huge boost of confidence for me, seeing as orange is the colour of fertility. I love it when coincidences like that happen.

Anyway, back to the scan. So using the ever delightful 'dildo cam' the sonographer proceeded to check to see whether my womb lining was nice and thin, and that my ovaries were dormant. She confirmed that the injections had clearly been working because both ovaries were quiet (i like that term) and my lining was a lovely 3.5mm in thinkness. At this stage she wanted to see that it was 5mm or less! So that is excellent!

After i had got dressed we sat down and went through the next stage of treatment. I am now to reduce the DR Buserelin to 20mg per day, and start taking Progynova tablets. They are tiny blue HRT pills which are used to increase the thickness of my womb lining in preparation for the ET (Embryo Transfer). I am to start with 3 tablets per day, and they slowly increase in number for the next 12 days, eventually taking 5 per day.


Our next appointment is now in just 11 days, on the 17th May. My lovely sister Lauren is going to be coming with me because Phil is unable to get the day off. This is for another scan to check my womb lining has increased. I think it is ideally meant to be over 8mm thick so that the embryo(s) can implant. When i had this same scan last time i remember my lining was 12mm thick! So hopefully i can achieve similar this time. Fingers crossed!

In the mean time i am still suffering the tiredness effect of the Buserelin. It is making me quite irritable and at times i can be quite snappy. I am trying my best to be calm and happy though. Plus Phil is being very helpful letting me have a lot of lie-ins, and buying me lots of chocolate! Ha ha. Injecting is still very hit and miss. Some days the needle goes in like a dream, and others... like today... well, lets just say it hurt a lot, and i cried a bit. Tomorrow is a new day though and i am sure the next injection will be much easier.

I don't feel as though time is dragging on at all. Every day seems to be going faster, and most of the time i am shocked that it is 6pm again, time to inject again. Plus now with the added task of taking the Progynova tablets at regular intervals throughout the day the time will go even faster. I am sure that once i am PUPO though, the two week wait will take forever!

Take Care All x

25 April 2016

1st Week Complete!

Hello Everyone!

So here we are, 1 week in from starting our FET treatment. Wow i am shattered... i had forgotten how utterly exhausting it is to do this. Not only from the stress of it all but the DR drug Buserelin is literally like a sedative! Ha ha. Ok, maybe not quite a sedative, but you get my meaning! 

Aside from feeling hungry all the time (this could also be from the steroids though) being more tearful than usual and feeling a little nauseous, it is just the tiredness that is a struggle again. I read back on this blog to when i was DR the first time round and saw that i was complaining of the exact same thing then. I want to go to bed as soon as i can in the evenings, and even if i have an amazing sleep i still feel tired a few hours after waking up.

The injections are going well. Most of the time it can be a bit tricky to get the needle in but on the odd occasion it is going in relatively easy. My tummy is starting to look like a dot-to-dot now though! Ha ha.

I am due my period today seeing as i am now on CD28. However there is no guarantee that it will happen today, in fact the Buserelin can actually delay your period. So i am expecting to come on within the next 2-3 days or so. After AF has arrived then i can email the clinic to let them know, and continue the countdown to the Base Scan on the 5th.

Now we are a week in i have settled in to the treatment quite well i think. I am again not thinking so much about the end goal. More so the little goals in between. Like each injection, and getting to the scan dates, and eventually ET and OFD (Official Test Date). I feel that i am living each day as it happens, but also keeping a positive mind on things.

As my brother said to me 'Stay Positive, and it will Be Positive'. Bless him, i don't think he quite realises how much i have kept that comment in my mind.

Thank you all for your positive thoughts for us!

Take Care All xxx

19 April 2016

Just like a Dart!

Hello Everyone!

You will all be pleased to know that yesterday went perfectly. Must have been due to my lucky orange pants and Pandora bracelet...

On the long drive up to Bourn Hall, Phil and i had been talking about how we felt about what might happen in the next coming months, and how we both were excited to start the process. We spoke about how wonderful Emma is, and how lucky we are to have her. It was strange to think that hopefully today we would be taking the steps to change the rest of our lives.

We arrived at the clinic in good time for our 9:30am appointment with Dr Matthews, and just like the drive, everything went smoothly from there after. We were called in and Dr Matthews firstly apologised about the problems we had with our blood test results. That was really nice of him to take a moment to do that. Then he went on to say how lovely it was that we were able to have Emma on our first try a few years ago, he asked if she was a good girl, and said that he suspects she is spoiled by her Nanny and Grandad. We all laughed as Phil and i both agreed that yes, she is!

He then went on to ask what we would like to do next, would we like to go straight ahead with the FET, or would we be looking to have any more IVF in the future. We said that we would only wish to use our remaining 2 embryos in the hope of creating a sibling for Emma, and that we wouldn't be able to consider IVF due to the costs, and the fact that of course there are no guarantees that any treatment will result in a child. We felt that it was best for us to give the FET our very best attempt. That any savings that we have should go to our child's(ren) happiness and quality of life, rather than the possibility of another. For us to not get lost in a dream, and for Emma's life to be on hold. Dr Matthews agreed with us, and said that it was a healthy way to look at things.

So then he asked when we would like to start treatment, to which i replied 'today?'. He agreed to start us today, and that he would arrange the prescription for the DR solution, Buserelin. He also said that because we have 2 embryos only, and that on average 60% of embryos survive the thawing process, he would like to thaw them both and put both back in my womb at the time of ET (Embryo Transfer) to give us the best chance possible. He wanted to stress that putting them both back could mean a strong chance of a multiple pregnancy, which in itself can have risk factors. We took his thoughts on board but agreed to the choice to put both back. If both thaw well that is...

After a little wait we then went in to see a Nurse, her name was Laura. She gave us our treatment plan, including an estimated date of ET! These details are as follows:

18/04/16 - DR begins. Start injecting 0.5mgs of Buserelin at 6pm.

05/05/16 - Baseline Scan at 10:15am. Then hopefully start Progonova tablets (to build up my womb lining) and reduce the Buserelin down to 0.2mgs.

17/05/16 - Lining Scan at 14:45pm. To check that my womb lining is growing well.

24/05/16 - Provisional ET date! If my lining has grown well then this will likely be the day that the embryos will be thawed and placed back into my womb.

It is so nice to have a plan in place! I have added each of the above dates into a countdown app on my mobile, i love watching the time pass by. What is also really lovely is that if the transfer does happen on the 24th May we will be on holiday in Centre Parcs. Luckily we will be closer to the clinic, and Phil's parents will be able to entertain Emma for a couple of hours whilst we scoot up there and have them put in. Then i can just relax, go for gentle walks, be among the trees and nature, and let the embryos snuggle in and become our baby(s).

After seeing the Nurse we then went in to collect our Buserelin and needles, sharps box etc. It was the same room we were in years ago which bought back some lovely memories. The whole morning was a wonderful look back at our journey to bring home Emma. The grounds of Bourn Hall are so beautiful, and all you can hear are birds tweeting. It makes you feel so relaxed and we both felt positive, and happy to be starting treatment. On the drive home we stopped for lunch at the same services that we had stopped off at for each appointment years before, i expect i shall do the same when i go to my next appointments.

At 5:40pm i got everything organised for the first injection. The process was very similar to the original injections i did. The bag to carry it all in in different this time though, a lovely shade of purple. I expect i will use it still in the future! Handy! What made me laugh is the 'helpful' guide to injecting yourself. Even though i had done it many times before, starting again was very frightening. The process of injecting yourself just doesn't fit right in my mind. No matter how many times i try to trick myself in to thinking it is normal, it isn't! Ha ha. The guide is very informative and uses the phrase 'insert the needle into the tummy area with a 'dart like' motion'. A dart!? How do you comprehend using a dart like motion to stab yourself! Ha ha.

Anyway, at 6pm, everything was ready to go:


It took a few minutes but i finally managed to do my 1st injection with very little problem. I now have a small series of little red pin prick dots from 'practice shots'. After a few minutes, like the time i did my 1st injection before, my skin surrounding the injection site came up in a small bumpy, rash. Similar to a stingy nettle rash. However after a while it reduced back to normal and i just had a bit of stinging in the area for a while.

So step one has been taken! We are on our way, and can't wait to watch the weeks unfold.

Take Care All x

17 April 2016

The Beginning of the End

Hello Everyone!

The day is almost here to start our second journey to becoming mummy and daddy again to another beautiful miracle. Just 12 hours stand between the 3 of us and the beginning of the end of this chapter of our lives. At this moment in time i am very excited to begin our FET. It has been a long time coming, and i can't wait to get to the clinic tomorrow.

Looking at Emma today has been strange, little does she know that from tomorrow mummy and daddy are going to be trying everything they can to create a cherished sibling for her. A forever friend, someone who will be there for all of her future milestones, and she for all of theirs. Someone who she can confide in, tell secrets to, learn from and teach. Our dream for our second child is only surpassed by our wish for Emma to have a brother or a sister.

As we embark on this new chapter i am feeling both excited and anxious. I am ready to welcome the road ahead. Ready for the injections, the lining scans, the multiple hours driving to and from the clinic. I am ready for transfer day, and being PUPO (pregnant until proven otherwise). I am ready for the OTD (official test date) and for the pregnancy scan that comes after a positive test. All of those goals i am mentally prepared for, and eager to face and pass.

Then hidden behind the excitement and positivity my anxiety creeps in.

What if the embryos don't thaw? What if they do thaw but they don't implant? What if we get a positive pregnancy test, but the scan shows no heartbeat... What if we go through all of the treatment and do not get our second miracle.

What happens after that?

I can't bear to think about that yet. We must keep our minds on our goal, and take each step as it comes.

We are incredibly lucky to have Emma, and can only hope that our 2 little embryos are strong like she was. That they snuggle in and stay sticky so they can be born into our waiting, open arms.

Take Care All xxx

11 April 2016

Countdown to Consultation

Hello Everyone!

The countdown has reached an exciting time. 1 week to go! This time next week we will have had our appointment and hopefully have a plan in place to start DR straight away! One of the ladies on BabyCentre who has had a FET has said that she started on her CD21, so there is hope for us.

My weight is ok, it could be better, it could be worse. Hopefully can shift just a couple more pounds to make me feel a bit better about it, but it should be acceptable. It doesn't really help that i have had to start taking steroids again for my eye, only 5mg though. They shouldn't be a problem for the FET. Apparently some ladies are put on steroids to help with implantation, so maybe it is a good thing?

Thankfully our lab report was accepted by Bourn Hall too! How things can flip so quickly is crazy!

We are feel happy and confident (but not overly confident) about our FET. We have an excellent quality embryo, and a great quality embryo waiting for us, so as long as they thaw nicely then we will be putting both back in, and with any luck one (or both!) will become our much longed for baby (or babies!) and sibling for Emma. A good way to look at it i guess is to know that it has already been decided, what will be will be, and all we have control over is how we approach each step.

So for now all we have to do is look forward to our appointment, we have everything ready and in place to start on Monday. All we need is a little faith and luck.

Oh, and i need to find some orange knickers! Ha ha!

Take Care All xxx

4 April 2016

Apple Cart

Hello Everyone,

So my apple cart has well and truly tipped over! I am in a state of shock, disbelief and just amazement at how so many things can change and have individual problems in getting us to our goal.

This morning i woke up with the feeling that our consultation appointment was going to be changed. Low and behold at around 11am i received a call and then voicemail on my phone from Sharon at Bourn Hall to say that our consultant is no longer available on the 15th April. She asked if i could call her back to re-arrange. After much stress the appointment has now changed to Monday 18th April at 9:30am.

This will be Cycle Day 21.

The day that DR (Down Regulation) is meant to start.

I mentioned to Sharon that the reason of us bringing the treatment forward was because of my medical condition, and that starting the treatment as soon as possible was the whole point. She said she knows that the consultant would move to start everything as soon as he could, and hopefully it could be on the 18th still.

Alongside that i have called and spoken to Jim at the GUM clinic. He has confirmed that we are ok to collect the lab reports on Wednesday, but again mentioned that it was strange that Bourn Hall were asking for it. He also mentioned though that the lab reports would not have our names on them, only our GUM clinic reference and date of birth. However the letters he wrote for us originally will have our names, date of birth and GUM clinic reference on them, so all that Bourn Hall would have to do is put the 2 letters together.

I rang Bourn Hall back to let them know the above and i am waiting for the nurses to come back to me as to whether that is ok... if it is not then the whole process starts again! I can not believe that it has taken a month to get nowhere!

I feel stressed and that nothing is going right. I don't understand why it is so difficult to bring everything together at the moment.

What started as a good day has now turned into a bad one.

Take Care All x